Hello all, I hope I can find help here

[atapp21]

Hello,

I don't know if there is a difference between stammering and stuttering but I consider myself a stammerer. I can't pinpoint when I started this stammering but it has seem to be going on through out my life. I don't know what triggers it but there are some days that are worse than others.

First some insight on my background. My Grandmother is from the south and speaks very fast so with that I believe thats where I pick up my cadence. Speaking fast does not help my problem because this where I tend to fumble over my words and then the anxiety sets in. I was once able to give speaches in grade school, now I'm so conscious of my situations I won't attempt to give a speech.

The thing that baffles my mind about this whole stuttering thing is that there are times that I am perfectly fine but then there are times where I feel I have to speak and everything gets stuck in my throat. I have to try and force the words out and then I do nothing but stammer. These situations are both embarrasing and frustrating. I notice that there are certain words or phrases that I get stuck on like "and". I also notice if I get riled up that I'm done when it comes to speaking.

I joined this site because I'm hoping someone will be able to point me in the direction that will help me. I've asked school counselors and the family doctors but they seem not to know where to send me. Hoping to find help. :confused:

[ElectricVersion]

hello atapp21,

welcome to the forum. i am pretty new to the forum myself, only having a few posts of my own.

you'll definitely find help on here, as well as the comfort in knowing you are so not alone in this struggle.

I know what you mean about becoming more self-aware of your speech (problem) as you become older. when i was a kid (i'm 32 now) my stutter would come and go. and when it went away, i didn't really care that much, i was just happy to be free of it for a while. when you become older, you notice more, and become more self-aware so things in life become more consistent (including the stuttering/stammering).

I think the greatest thing you can do is developing new habits. Habits guide us thru ever aspect of our lives, and our stuttering/stammering is not an exception. Our speech impediment is a habit that we've developed. Habits can be broken, but sometimes it takes a lot of work.

I'm still new at the breathing excercises that people recommend on here, I'm sure other people will reply and tell you about resources where you can get that information. But i think developing those new habits of breathing, relaxation and such will help you out a ton.

I'm not sure how it is for you, but i know one major perception-flaw i have/had.. is... When i speak fluently, I see THAT as the abnormality. like the fluke. ya know. the accident. like "oh, i just happened to be fluent that time, but usually i stutter my arse off."

I've tried to invert my thinking, and remind myself that my fluent times are the norm, and should also be viewed as victories. the influent times are the flukes, the accident. the temporary slip-ups.

I don't know if any of this helps you at all. i know this struggle is a complicated thing,and it sucks behind all explanation. Hang in there, and again, welcome to the forum!

[atapp21]

ElectricVersion,

Thanks for the support and the vote of confidence. I would definitely like more information on the breathing exercise. I'm willing to try almost any proven method that works. You know another baffling thing I began to ponder, why is it that I say almost anything in a whisper to myself but have trouble saying the same thing out loud?

I really would like to lick this problem of mine or at least put it in check. You recommend that I develope new habits but first I think I have to become aware of what bad habits cause me to stutter. I may not be aware of some the triggers. What new habits do I replace my old habits with?

Again I think you for your assistance and I look forward to finding more help in these forums.