dritan
08-12-2006, 06:12 PM
What the others think about me?
This question was the topic of discussion with Elio, one of my guys today. His cousin’s fiancé, an Italian, had been at his home for about one week and the stuttering had come forward a lot. Elio was very worried about the reoccurrence and asked me to find together the cause. We discussed it and found three reasons for his reemerging stuttering. He had not blocked, just stuttered a bit more then usually.
1- He was speaking in Italian, a language that he does not know very well.
2- The stressed up situation had gone on for about one week without any break.
3- He was afraid of “what the guest will think about him and his stuttering”.
I asked Elio to tell me what he had thought that the guest would have thought about him. He tried to think hard about this and nothing came out. An hour of analysis and hypothesis and we could not find a shred of what the Italian guest might have thought about Eliot.
The conclusion: The poor Italian guy did not have the time to think about anything in first place, because it was the first time that he had come to Albania with his new fiancé and was trying to leave a good impression. Secondly, Elios stuttering was not an obstacle in the way of his visit and the most of all, it wasn’t important.
Though, everything was in the Elios mind.
Elio had tried to hide so hard his stuttering and had ended up stuttering a lot. Why?
Think if you have someone in front of you and this person is keeping his hand hidden behind his back and is very emotional and looks uncomforted. What will you think? He is trying to hide something from you. In your head the question will cover anything else you will try to think. What the hell is he hiding?
I think is probably nothing. A cell phone, e packet of cigarettes or a candy bar.
Now think! If his hands weren’t hidden you would have not thought so hard to find out what he was hiding.
The same thing happens with our stuttering. We try so hard so the others won’t see it and end up by bringing our stuttering forcefully in their attention. All of this because the question: What will he think about my stuttering?
What will he think? I assure you, nothing! The person in front of you has a lot to think about his prostate, her kidneys, the kids, the bills, the rent, the unfaithful boy or girlfriend… Do I need to go on?
Even if someone thinks something about my stuttering, who gives a sh…
This question was the topic of discussion with Elio, one of my guys today. His cousin’s fiancé, an Italian, had been at his home for about one week and the stuttering had come forward a lot. Elio was very worried about the reoccurrence and asked me to find together the cause. We discussed it and found three reasons for his reemerging stuttering. He had not blocked, just stuttered a bit more then usually.
1- He was speaking in Italian, a language that he does not know very well.
2- The stressed up situation had gone on for about one week without any break.
3- He was afraid of “what the guest will think about him and his stuttering”.
I asked Elio to tell me what he had thought that the guest would have thought about him. He tried to think hard about this and nothing came out. An hour of analysis and hypothesis and we could not find a shred of what the Italian guest might have thought about Eliot.
The conclusion: The poor Italian guy did not have the time to think about anything in first place, because it was the first time that he had come to Albania with his new fiancé and was trying to leave a good impression. Secondly, Elios stuttering was not an obstacle in the way of his visit and the most of all, it wasn’t important.
Though, everything was in the Elios mind.
Elio had tried to hide so hard his stuttering and had ended up stuttering a lot. Why?
Think if you have someone in front of you and this person is keeping his hand hidden behind his back and is very emotional and looks uncomforted. What will you think? He is trying to hide something from you. In your head the question will cover anything else you will try to think. What the hell is he hiding?
I think is probably nothing. A cell phone, e packet of cigarettes or a candy bar.
Now think! If his hands weren’t hidden you would have not thought so hard to find out what he was hiding.
The same thing happens with our stuttering. We try so hard so the others won’t see it and end up by bringing our stuttering forcefully in their attention. All of this because the question: What will he think about my stuttering?
What will he think? I assure you, nothing! The person in front of you has a lot to think about his prostate, her kidneys, the kids, the bills, the rent, the unfaithful boy or girlfriend… Do I need to go on?
Even if someone thinks something about my stuttering, who gives a sh…